The Smartest way to resolve a conflict: the Listen protocol (a better Indian talking stick)

Person A and Person B sit knees to knees in 2 chairs. (knees pointing toward each other)

Optionally, Person C (Coach/consultant) sits next to them and makes sure they follow the protocol.

1. Person A and Person B each state their alignments.

2. Person A begins saying what he wants to say to Person B in short chunks.

3. For each chunk Person B repeats back what he heard in his own words

(verbatim is ok).

4. Person B asks Person A “Is that right?”

5. Person A either says yes (goto 6) or no and repeats the chunk at
step 2 until Person A says Yes to the question “Is that right?’

6. Person B asks “is there more?” if Person A says yes, goes to the next chunk in step 2.
If Person A says no then the positions switch and Person B begins saying what he wants, step 2.

The positions can keep switching until both are done saying what they want to say

If you can’t keep protocol, checkout.

If you don’t understand when you are the listener, you may ask a question.

You may not argue, correct, or do anything else except ask a question (with the intention of understanding what you are hearing) when you are the listener.

I am Yves Hanoulle, your virtual Project Coach and you can reach me @ Yves at my agile training company .net

Tags van Technorati: FranklinCovey,McCarthy BootCamp,Indian Talking Stick,Listening Protocol,smart arguing,the smartest way to resolve a conflict